Thursday, March 14, 2013

7 Takes, 2013, Vol. 9

--- 1 ---
Dear Google:
Change can be productive in a relationship but baby, you are changing too quickly for me.  First, you decide to do away with iGoogle and try to tell me that Chrome has many of the same features (liar!). Now you are telling me that Google Reader just isn't working for you.  What about me?  It works very well for me! You are only giving me FOUR months notice (at least with iGoogle you have spent the last year warning me).  You already ended our Google Friend Connect with some of my non blogger blog friends. Google, what is going on?  Are you having a "wig out stage" (as Horn likes to call it). I want you to be happy but I need to be happy in this relationship as well.  Can we talk about this? Call me, maybe.
Love, You loyal follower

--- 2 ---
I need to stop eating late at night. I have way to vivid dreams.  For instance, this morning (as I was slapping my snooze on my phone), I dreamt that I was at the local state university at a diversity fair. I was walking with someone and discussing one of the banners (similar above) when a pizza delivery man in a blue car with hydraulics was bouncing backwards and hit a black suv and me. I fell down and demanded the pizza delivery man call an ambulance even though I didn't think that I was hurt too bad, just bruised. I woke up about this time, and as I was lying in the bed, I thought to myself, "Hmm...maybe I should cancel my class this morning and call in sick, after all, I was just hit by a low rider." I then realized it was a dream (thankfully).

--- 3 ---
Hannabert spent the day with GmaB on Wednesday this week. Apparently they spent some time clogging to Irish music. He refused to demonstrate his skill to Horn. Likewise, he refuses to demonstrate that he can nap when he is with us but gifts GmaB with a THREE hour nap. Not fair little ba'y, not fair.

--- 4 ---
Easter always brings me memories of making Easter candy with my college roommate. It was always painful that we had given up sweets and yet we were charged with the making of 100s of peanut butter, butter cream, and coconut easter eggs. Now that I am in Ohio, I am all about the Papas Easter Candy. They are "local" to us and I only find their candy at this time of the year. The flavors make me happy and I don't have to make them although, as Hannabert gets older, I think that we will DEFINITELY start the tradition of making candy for Easter.

--- 5 ---
Ooops! Haven't said anything about Pope Francis! I did mention him yesterday. Horn graduated from a Jesuit high school and really excited to have a Jesuit Priest...but hat Jesuit would want to be confused for a Franciscan (according to him)?  Also, does anyone else not like the fact that some news media outlets are just calling him Francis?  Most world leaders are not just called their first name...

--- 6 ---
Stacy at Catholic & Crunchy wrote about budgeting and frugality and I am hoping that Horn and I can have a discussion on that topic this weekend. I have the primary responsibility for finances and it is causing me a great deal of stress. Horn's parents brought us to a Dave Ramsey seminar a few years ago and I think that we need to get back on that train.

--7 ---
Do you think it is helpful or harmful to put your complete financial self out there?

For more Quick Takes, visit Conversion Diary!

Wednesday, March 13, 2013

New Pope

My candidate wasn't the select elect, but I am excited to see how Pope Francis will lead the Church. My mom actually was checking the bet spreads but I resisted.

My parents were hoping that the pope would be more open to things like birth control and homosexual adoption.

I pray that Pope Francis supports the doctrine of the faith and that the Church's followers respond.

PS I love that the Huffington Post used TMZ as a credible source.

Friday, March 08, 2013

Is there no sleep solution

Welcome to the Taboo Carnival. Our topic this Spring is RESPONDING TO THE NATURAL PARENTING COMMUNITY! This post was written for inclusion in the quarterly Taboo Carnival hosted by Momma Jorje and Hybrid Rasta Mama. This month our participants reflect on criticism of the natural parenting community both from those parents outside of it’s perceived borders as well as those inside the community itself. Please read to the end to find a list of links to the other carnival participants.

Hannabert turned 2 years old in February. I somehow had the impression that it would mean he would suddenly sleep at night. I was wrong. I blame myself. When I read blogs by attached or natural parents, it always seems as if one of the parents (typically mom) doesn't work out side the home. Our situation doesn't allow us that (damn law school loans) so I know that my need to sleep because I am working two jobs is the cause of Hannabert's sleep issues.

Oh, he looks like he is tired. Even has the jammies on...
Hannabert's sleep schedule from birth was a bit..odd to say the least. Horn and I worked full-time from 2:30 pm to 11 pm. In the mornings, we taught alternating days at a local college. The one not teaching had baby duty. When Hannabert was wakeful after daycare, it wasn't too big of a deal because the non-teaching parent would take care of him. I had a tad bit more time with him as he breastfed regularly.  This schedule worked really well for the most part. Yes, there were some frustrations and some longing for Horn and I to get more alone time. Yes, Hannabert didn't like being put in his crib but more often than not we could wait him out.

I blamed Hannabert's wakefulness on the fact that I swear his room is haunted. Look for the orb at about 50 sec into this cllip
This all changed this past November when Horn received a fabulous job opportunity...that required him to work court hours. Suddenly, from both of us working night hours, we had to switch in a week to him working 8am to 4pm. With a drive that takes 1.5hrs. Each way. 

For us, it meant me taking over Horn's morning class. It also meant that Hannabert now got dropped off at daycare at 7 am rather than 2 pm. I started teaching 3 mornings a week while working until 11pm 5 days a week. I no longer saw Hannabert or Horn on most nights (especially IF Horn was successful in getting Hannabert to sleep).  When Hannabert would wake-up when I got home, I secretly relished the snuggle moments with him.

But that snuggly feeling stopped when we both developed mono. Apparently while adults are exhausted toddlers do not get so exhausted. Hannabert still wakes up when I come home but he doesn't want snuggles, he wants to play. I am exhausted from work from 8 am until 11 pm. Horn is exhausted because he woke-up at 5:30 am to get ready for work, dropped Hannabert off at daycare, and then did solo parenting with him all evening, often times not getting to bed until I get home around 11:30 pm.

But I know the problem is me. He sleeps at daycare (on the couch or chair while parents come and go and other children play around him!). He sleeps when being watching by others (most notably at Horn's best friend's house when they asked him to lay down, he asked for a blanket, and he was alseep in seconds). 
Perhaps it is my fault that I nursed/rocked him to sleep. Perhaps it is Horn's fault for playing video games while Hannabert snuggled into him. Maybe it is our strange love/hate relationship with Bedtime Stories (we both have loves/hates in this series.  Horn HATES Millions of Cats and I don't like Elbert's Bad Word because the story really doesn't flow).  Maybe we should have done sleep training.  I was the one against it! I even got involved in a few social media spats (that resulted in me defriending earlier noted best friend and his wife because they kept getting offended). Maybe it was co-sleeping that did us in! 

While I know it is NORMAL for kids to NOT sleep alone or sleep through the night until 3 or 4, but I feel like we are so alone. Everyone else is either lying about their kids sleeping or we truly are the only people in the world with a toddler who is as wide awake. I asked a co-worker, who is doing their FOURTH round of Feber with their 8 month old (per dr. directions), and she clearly indicated that we were the only parents in this situation.

I know we aren't and I know that our situation has been very different than most of our friends who either work a traditional schedule or have one of the parents stay at home with the children during the day so the waking/sleep times aren't being shuffled around by daycare drop off/pick ups. 
In the meantime, we do have a bedtime routine. We do the calming bubble bath, duckie towel, baby in the mirror (Horn holds up Hannabert, wrapped in his towel, to the bathroom mirror), Peace  Calming Young Living Essential Oil application, calming lotion, books, stories, and snuggles. We don't get the drift off to sleep. Nope. A five minute sleep/nap/eyes shut/rests results in HOURS of wakefulness.

Horn and I agree that it is important to be responsive to Hannabert at night just as much as we are during the day hours but we are quickly losing patience and we are both exhausted. We are frustrated with him and each other. We all just want sleep. Hopefully this stage will end soon. We are trying hard to to stick the the same AM wake-up time and that really seems to be working. Things have gotten better and I hope they continue to improve.

As a side note to that, we cannot express how grateful we are to Hannabert's daycare provider who was willing to watch Hannabert so late each night for almost 2 years. They were always supportive of me providing breastmilk and provided us reassurances that Hannabert was eating MORE than enough when his ped. was concerned about his lack of weight gain. It is so important to have supporters who believe in you as a parent and whose philosophies match yours when it comes to parenting styles. 

Visit Momma Jorje and Hybrid Rasta Mama to find out how you can participate in the next Taboo Carnival! Enjoy the posts from this month’s Carnival participants!
  • Stop Bashing Each Other Already! — Jennifer at Hybrid Rasta Mama muses on why for her, “natural parenting” involves more work and why it would be more supportive to all parents if there wasn’t such a great divide based on parenting styles.

  • Politically Correct Natural Parenting — Jorje of Momma Jorje doesn't want parents practicing Natural Parenting to walk on eggshells with other parents.

  • Just bought some! — Lindsay at The Life of Lulu Belle just bought some of Kelapo's coconut oil but hasn't had a chance to try it yet.

  • Keep Your Labels — ANonyMous @Radical Ramblings discusses why she isn't comfortable with the label “natural parent” and urges us all to be a little more respectful and accepting.

  • Finding a Happy Parent Place — A “circumstantial loner,” Mercedes at Project Procrastinot enjoys her forays in to the Natural Parenting community while learning the ropes of mothering twins.

  • On reason, research, and natural parenting — Lauren at Hobo Mama wishes reason and logic were valued more than gut feelings and instinct.

  • Is there a No Sleep Solution? — Hannah at Hannahandhorn wonders when she will sleep again.

7 Takes, 2013, Vol. 8

Link up at:

--- 1 ---

On Monday, Tuesday, and Fridays, I am responsible for Hannabert in the morning.  We are always running late to daycare/work because, well, would you want to leave him?
March 8, 2013


March 5, 2013

March 4. 2013 - He insisted on getting dressed in the middle of the night. He insisted  on shoes and I insisted he wear a diaper

--- 2 ---

I really really like being home at a "normal" time 3 days a week. Heaven.

--- 3 ---

Even though I am home at night with the guys more often, the house isn't any cleaner.  Why can't husbands multi-task or is it just mine? I have been cleaning up when I get home on my two "late nights."

--- 4 ---

Work life at current job is...growing a tad bit hostile between my supervisor and me. Snippy emails, frustrated conversations. A discussion as to why my mono wasn't better yet when a co-worker's daughter was fine after three weeks (which, ironically enough, I asked the co-worker about and he laughed and said the 3 weeks time my supervisor cited was HOW LONG SHE WAS OFF FROM SCHOOL and that she most certainly was not yet "all better."

--- 5 ---

My sister is having a baby shower in a few weeks. I will not be able to attend. As my dad is working less doing taxes as in years past and my brother is on federal sequester, Mom, Sister-in-Law, and I went in on a gift. Is that tacky?

--- 6 ---

I supplemented with few things not on the registry. I went with a more a baby store in NC.  There is apparently a diaper competition, so I included some reusable (apparently this is the "new" "green" term) diapers for her diaper bag. An amber bracelet as Hannabert loves his necklace and asks for it when he doesn't feel well. I went with the bracelet because the necklace is sure to freak out all grandparents everywhere and with the bracelet she can hide it  under a pair of socks. Based on the photo that was making the social media rounds, got her a Nasal Aspirator. We haven't used this one because we have the Nose Frida but this uses nose tissue rather than filters. [NOTE: I am not an affiliate of Sweet Bottoms, I just like that they were in North Carolina where my family lives and that they offered free shipping]

--- 7 ---
I am attending a retirement party for a law school professor who is an expert on minority healthcare. She also directed the academic program at the law school for a number of years. I can tell you that I was a successful student because of everything she taught me and the countless students before me.  She will be greatly missed in the local academic world. I cannot say that I always agreed with everything she believes, but she empowered me to not take what I think I know at face value. Thank you Prof. Randall for all that you have done and all that you will continue to do. 

For more Quick Takes, visit Conversion Diary!